Men get a shit deal in divorce!

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Frog on 6th October 2009, 3:14 pm

Do you mean in terms of property, custody etc?

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Bones on 6th October 2009, 3:16 pm

Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked

We agree on something else! cheers cheers

I can only think of one person alive today who I would seriously marry. The only reason being that if we were to divorce I would have no problems with giving her half of everything I own & there would be no custody battle as we would both want what's best for our children.

Apart from that one woman, I don't see what anyone else has done or would do to earn it..........

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Frog on 6th October 2009, 3:21 pm

You can see how the situation has come about though surely, historically speaking a woman would have been expected to care for the children so would need adequate finances/property etc to cover that. I guess the law hasn't quite caught up with the times yets but tbh it's not something that I know a great deal about.

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Bones on 6th October 2009, 3:25 pm

Nah, Just half. If we have kids then what I pay towards them doesn't count in my mind as once I have children everything I do will be for their benefit.

Wouldn't need a judge or anything like that to tell me how much. I'd sort it out with the wife & we'd take it from there.

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Frog on 6th October 2009, 3:27 pm

Provided she thought the same as you and if you're breaking up it woud be fair to say that's unlikely.

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Bones on 6th October 2009, 3:28 pm

If I make a life time commitment to marry her you can be pretty sure that we'd be on the same page should the worst come to pass. If I thought for a second that this wasn't the case then I wouldn't marry her.

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Frog on 6th October 2009, 3:31 pm

You’re a pretty perceptive guy though so maybe you could do that but I doubt it would be that easy for the majority of men swept up in an extended honeymoon period.

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Bones on 6th October 2009, 3:46 pm

LP - I agree that the majority of men out there are swept away with emotions which blind their better judgment. I'm the kind of person who likes to think worst case scenario instead of hoping for ever lasting happiness.......

Ty - Considering that the woman I'm talking about I have known now for the best part of 15 years, I think I'm in a good position to preempt her reaction in most situations. Getting married is a very big deal & as such I need to be very sure about the "chosen one". I wouldn't have children with a woman I saw as an unfit mother, because worst case scenario is that I'm not around & she struggles with the kids.
I wouldn't marry a woman who didn't share quite a few of my views on life. I wouldn't marry a woman if I couldn't trust her to be fair & dignified should the worst come to pass.

I don't know everything about anybody but I do know that if you are blinded by the bright lights of love the things you need to know will stay in the dark. As such I like to take my time & wear sunglasses Wink LP

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Bones on 6th October 2009, 4:31 pm

I'm in a better position to guess her reaction than I would be if I met her 15 minutes ago...... I don't think that my chosen one would screw me over, but I don't dismiss it as an impossibility. I could be wrong & completely off the mark with how I think she will react to a situation, but knowing or at least having some idea of how your chosen one will react to a situation allows you to tailor your responses & actions to achieve the desired result.

Thus far I have been able to correctly guess her reactions to different situations. I wouldn't say that I have a 100% success rate, but I would say it's at least 70%. I know my chosen one well & as I said before if I had even a second of doubt I wouldn't even consider putting a ring on her finger. Also, if she's managed to hide that side of her from me for the last 15 years & continues to do so for the next 15 years then maybe she deserves everything she can get from me.... LP

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Bones on 6th October 2009, 4:55 pm

Life is chance & you can never be 100% sure of anything so the best thing to do is be as sure as you can be. I knew her better after 15 days than I did after 15 minutes. I knew her better after 15 weeks than I did after 15 days. I knew her better after 15 months than I did after 15 weeks & I'm pretty sure I know her better after 15 years than I did after 15 months.

Yes, it's all about chance, but your own chances increase over time. We're not all the same & we all react in different ways to different things which is why for any relationship to work you need to have some knowledge of how the other person handles things. All I'm saying is that after 15 years of taking the rough & smooth you tend to start noticing when the rough is on its way & how best to handle it this time or at least which route not to take to make things worse.........

But we're still agreed that in all aspects of divorce proceedings, the law does favour the female of the species.

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Bones on 6th October 2009, 6:43 pm

I can understand that view if there are children involved, but if not then why not walk away from the relationship with what you walked in with? Why do you have to pay for what could be little more than realising you made the wrong choice...?

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Frog on 21st December 2009, 2:49 am

Not everyone gets screwed over by the system it seems Wink

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Truthy on 12th January 2010, 2:15 am

Tytonidae wrote:I think this is true that the law hasn't caught up and its high time it did. Women want all the benefits of absolute equality but then overtly play the victim role in divorce! Self respect goes out of the window in a frenzy of self interest!

As you know Ty, you and I very rarely agree on anything but I think you're spot on here but be careful or the radical feminists will be after you Laughing Laughing Laughing

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Re: Men get a shit deal in divorce!

Post by Truthy on 12th January 2010, 3:03 pm

Tytonidae wrote:I wouldn't say VERY rarely Truthy Wink - I'm fair and believe in equal pay for equal work etc., but I'm no feminist, all woman me Laughing

..I would have liked to see that extreme female perspective Truthy but I wonder if we must be correct in our thinking on this matter because I encountered not much opposition on this thread from women.

I've seen that extreme female perspective years ago and its not pleasant nor tolerant pale

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